A huge level of dependency
I've got one. A huge level of
dependency on BLISS for everything medical. She would claim for
everything, period. She may have a point. A typical exchange was:
BLISS: You had a blood test?
ME: [chest puffed out, all proud of
myself because I'd actually managed to book and fulfil a doctors
appointment all by myself] yes.
BLISS: What for?
ME: [getting too cocky for my own good]
well, they take blood out of my arm and send it to the lab, and...
BLISS: You're not funny. For what
purpose. Or just draining your arm for the sake of it?
ME: [sheepish now, knew it was too good
to be true] ...er...I don't know.
I didn't know. I hadn't even thought
about asking. I was just pleased to be another step closer to getting
out of there. Blood pressure, blood test, no weights and measures, no
poking and prodding, happy days. Blood comes out, blood goes off,
results come back, tested for, well, whatever it is they test for.
Cholesterol. Protein. Sugar. Loads of other stuff.
She knows about these sort of things,
and I don't know my arse from my elbow. Although that's a lack of
anatomical knowledge, rather than medical.
We were talking about her friend who's
very unwell at the moment, the problems including feeling too anxious
to leave their house. They're on antidepressants, a side effect of
which can be anxiety attacks. BLISS told me this with a straight
face, I had to do bit of a double take. That has to be the most
ineffective medicine known to man.
Headache? Take one of these. Possible
side effects include headaches. Asthma inhaler – may cause
breathlessness. Sleeping pills, side effect insomnia. I know the
politics and the big business is impossibly corrupt, but Jesus, I
didn't know the pharmaceutical companies were so powerful that they
no longer have to produce products with any benefits whatsoever.
Apparently one of the most popular antidepressants increases risk of
suicide.
I know it's not popular wellbeing
advice, and I know there's side effects to everything, but I can't
help wondering whether a majority might be better off with a
prescription for a chicken vindaloo, with large amounts of papadums
and lime pickle, or tickets to a B52's gig, or the latest feelgood
comedy at the multiscreen complex. Walking the dog on the beach on a
right good old windy day normally has a positive effect. As does that
first Clash album. Perhaps before the Prozac, we should have copies
of The Life of Brian on the Chemists' shelves.
Tightly packed prose...
...takes more reading. Like muscle as
opposed to fat, a spoonful can weigh a ton. It takes concentration
and much longer to get through, with frequent re-reading of phrases
and paragraphs to make sure I've got the meaning. Pynchon. Sinclair.
More ideas on a page than most manage in a chapter. I've just
finished Inherent Vice and my head is still full of Pynchon's cast of
thousands.
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