Nope, no Polish rhyming slang

International rhyming slang

I got a very nice email from Mr Naughty this morning. Really. Too kind. Thank you.

He asked if there was Polish rhyming slang. Apparently not, if Google is to be believed. All I got was jam roll = pole (used to be dole, if I remember the bad old Thatcher days). Too many words with too few vowels is my guess. There's probably precious few rhymes, let alone enough for a range of slang.

With their typical lack of originality, not only do the Aussies have rhyming slang, they seem to have the same rhyming slang as us. The only differences I found were:

After dark, and Noah's Ark = shark (not much call for that around these parts, not until climate change really hits us, anyway)

There was one for snake (also not much call for that here) but it was someone's name (say, Nathan Blake) that I've forgotten.

Germaine Greer = ear (yes, ear, not what the Python's Philosophers' Song would have you guessing, nor beer).

I liked St Louis Blues = shoes.

Their rhyming slang dictionary lacked the massive section ours has for piles. Obviously they don't suffer with the old ceramics the way we do.

Golden Times

That's on the kitchen table. My first thought was that someone's having a tin bath (laugh (bath's pronounced barff, and laugh larf, in London)). Taking the Mickey. Then I saw the sub-title: A Guide to Active Living, for the Over 50's. That's me. No one's having a prank or a wheeze, I'm entitled to receive copies of a magazine. For old folk. Blimey. When, and how, did that happen?

Walkers Classically...

...Ready Salted. With salt from Cheshire.

I've just had a packet of those. Can't say that the provenance of the salt made any difference. Not enough of a connoisseur, I guess. The cheese and onion remain non-classic. The nouveau flavour can't claim to come from anywhere because it's all onion and milk powder. 'From a chemical plant in Huddersfield' just hasn't the same ring to it.

Someone needs to tell...

...Aston Villa that a light, fluorescent green away kit makes it look like a team of stewards have come onto the pitch.