We're toast, Pleat says we're the bee's knees

K2 tax

Abhorrent. Morally vile. Indefensible. How can I get some? Let's face it, I've paid shedloads of tax. At source. At 20% (at least) on all purchases. At exorbitant per cent on petrol and beer. I'm due a bit of relief.

GCSE's and BSc's

Industry says the exams are rubbish. The exam boards and the education people say they're fine. This much I know: I have a graduate surveyor with Bsc(Hons) after his name. He can just about write in English, his first and only language. Their, they're and there are apparently interchangeable, as are you're and your.

I no indusrty luvs a moan + that, so their probably wrong + he's right.

Grexit and Chindown

After sub-prime toxic loans, we have Grexit (Greek exit) and Chindown (Chinese downturn) added to the economic disaster lexicon. Aparently Greece has a 'toxic mix of recession and austerity measures'.

Football's back...

Thank heavens. I've quickly become dependent. Had withdrawal yesterday.

I agree

With Cameron. Is that allowed around here? Gary Barlow is repugnant, abhorrent and nothing short of an abomination. Nothing to do with his tax affairs. Just the music.

England've had it

David Pleat, kerb-crawler extraordinaire and Tottenham Tosspot has endorsed England's chances of going all the way. Time to book those tickets home.

The doctors are on strike...

...does taking my pills amount to crossing the picket line? Should we all ignore all health advice for the day to show solidarity? Why should they chip in 14% to equivalent pensions while overpaid civil servants only pay 7%. Imagine that at the checkout of the petrol pump?

• Job?
• Ministry of Education, Whitehall.
• Cheese sandwich meal deal, £3.00. Next. Job?
• Doctor.
• Cheese sandwich meal deal. £6.00 please.