No skipping

I know my pecking order place

Or I knew it. It appears to have slipped a bit. A bit further downwards. I found some Primula cheese in the fridge. “Ah.” I thiought. “Primula cheese. With ham. Not vegetarian that. Must be left over from Christmas”. So I found some crackers and set about it. Then DLL came into the kitchen.

“Oy” she said “that's the dog's.”

“Eh?”

“That's the dog's training treat.”

“Never mind, I don't mind sharing.”

“He licks it directly straight from the tube.”

“Oh.”

Too good for the likes of me, then.


ASDA – not the most imaginative

There's a flash on the label of ASDA own brand sparkling water. It says:

“Good for hydration”.

Right. Water. Good for hydration. Not exactly earth-shatteringly original. “Useful for making a lovely light batter for pakoras, tempura and suchlike”. Okay, not too catchy, but hydration? ASDA water: clear, wet and, er, kinda runny. Can be frozen to make ice cubes. Only consume when poured out of the bottle first.


Same old same old

RBS (Rubbish, Bailedout, Suckers!) are making an £8bn loss. We, the taxpayers, own 80%.

£3bn is a fine for being dodgy, agiain.

£4.5bn is the cost of creating a bank within the bank to hold the toxic debts (who said the lessons of overcomplication and obfuscation had been taken onboard?).

The board have voted to bypass the EU regulations, in order to award bonuses of 200% of salaries. That's twice your annual salary, as a reward for being dodgy and losing £8bn after being bailed out.


Oy! That's my rubbish in that skip

There's a law against fox hunting. The police and the Crown Prosecution Service do nothing. The RSPCA were criticised for spending on bringing a case to court, a case they won. The CPS still does nothing.

The police have arrested blokes for taking tomatoes, mushrooms, and cheese from the bins out the back of a branch of Iceland. Great work, boys. They initially charged them with burglary. When that wasn't going to stick, they went for some outdated, archaic law about vagrancy or something, backed up by the CPS. There's weeping and wailing and gnashing of teeth about lack of confidence in the justice system. A lack of confidence that seems well-founded, when resources are wasted chasing guys raiding bins for food that's landfill-bound if they don't intercept it.