The Vatican odds

The new Archbish...

...has come out in support of women bishops. I don't know what that means religion-wise, but in gambling terms, if you're considering a wager on promotion for the Vicar of Dibley, get on quick before they close the book.

Wouldn't it be great if instead of all the crap reasons that motivate the pope and the (who? what? ayotollah? rabbae? what do buddists and jeddi knights and rastas have?) others, if they just played the odds at BetFair?

I've imagined the scene:

The pope's home cinema in the vatican. He's watching American Football (the Cardinals, his favourite team). Two nuns kneel at his feet, one supporting each foot, in sock and sandal. One nun holds his ashtray, he's smoking a huge, fat, foot-long cigar. The other holds the saucer for his cup of espresso. He's eating popcorn from his upturned hat. Enter an under-pope.

Heeeyyyyyy! Is'da Papa, ma pontif, dude!

They high five.

'Ello. Zis iz goot. Ow iz it goink? (Think 'Ello 'Ello German accent).

Izza okay, we havva da new idea...

...vot iz diz new idea? Iz it gud for za benk bellence?

Hey. Ma'papa. Da best ever. Alla you gotta do is mekka da proclamations we talla ya. We putta on da bets. We collect'a da lira.

Vot iz ze proclamations?

We giv'a da free condoms out in Africa.

Vot? Vot madness iz ziss?

20/1. Coral.

Tventy to von? Yah?

Si. Anna you allowa da abortion.

Nein! I vill never...

100 / 1?

Ve vill support da vomen viz da abortion needs from diz point onvards! Tony?

Si.

Put ze euros on for ze papa, danke.