Congratulations K

Has it come to this, one

Is having your head hoovered normal?

Haircut night last night. The girls find it amusing that I can sit there and let them get on with it. The hardest part was not repeatedly facing the wrong way (towards the computer and Sky Go coverage of West Ham v Stoke).

Clippered, scissored, newly shorn, I was trying to hear the match over the noise of the hoover as BLISS got the fur off the floor.

“When you move it always drops all over the place” she said, hoovering my trousers, then my back and chest and finally my head. This isn't normal, is it? It isn't dignified having your head hoovered.

Not when the other half of the double-act is snapping away with her phone camera.

Has it come to this, two

A cunning plan. We'll split up. Never works in horror films, that idea. The beginning of a right sticky end, usually. So we split up. They went one way to save some minutes collecting tickets. “Here, take this”. I was handed Non-LPL's phone. In case of emergency. I went outside to watch and wait.

Soon, I realised two things.

Outside a large London venue, where large numbers of people are meeting up, they tend to wait outside the main entrance, and there's a lot of mobile phone traffic.

I had no idea what the ringtone on the emergency phone in my pocket sounded like.

Nice one Kiz

A lot of hard work rewarded with a first class Bsc(Hons) and a good graduate job and well done. Congratulations.

When things hang together, but only just, when you arrive by the skin of your teeth, when rat poo turns to gold dust, when all's well that ends well; that's when you have great memories and fantastic days to look back on, and that's when in years to come there's stories and anecdotes to tell.

You can't belly up to the bar and hold an audience with “I got there in good time and it all went smoothly” can you?

Now, what do you need to graduate?

A degree? Check. A presentation ceremony? Check. Not much else to it, is there? Oh, yeah. A gown and a silly hat (not as silly as the Pope's, marginally less silly than a ten gallon but probably less practical, sillier than a baseball hat (but not when you're driving a car)). Ordered and paid for, but the gown people didn't process the order properly, so there wasn't a Batman cape and a hat.

Keep calm, and graduate.