Stuffing Luke into a dead tauntaun

Stuffing Luke into a dead tauntaun...or...

...or, the theory and practice of BLISS-ing and BLISS-isms.

BLISS has either developed a fantastic poker face, so much so that we should get her entered for all the Texas Hold-Em tournaments we can, and supply her with all the stakes she needs to amass fortunes, or she no longer differentiates between well-researched, documented, published fact that has undergone full and thorough academic and peer scrutiny (which she frequently hits us with), and absolute, made up on the spot tosh (which she less frequently, but regularly hits us with as well).

“Absolute tosh [of some description]” she says.

Typically, because no-one gets away with anything around here, greeted by either DLL, or me, or both bursting into peals of laughter.

Then she says:

“What?”

Or:

“What's so funny?”

Or (making it worse (the laughter) and more funny):

“Something that follows on from the absolute tosh, or builds upon it, or extends it, or is total, utter, with knobs on tosh-on-a-pogo stick”...

Last night it was Bear Grylls. How did he hydrate himself on a raft with no drinking water for miles? That was the question.

“Didn't he climb into a dead camel or something?”

Laughter.

DLL: At sea?

BLISS: Oh, didn't hear that bit...he did though...

DLL: Did what?

BLISS: Drink the water from a camel or something like that...

DLL: What? On a raft? Why'd he take a dead camel on a raft?

BLISS: No, not on a raft...or was it to keep warm?

So it goes. In the background, Grylls shoves a tube up his arse and selfie-enemas with dirty brown water. BLISS insists that there was something (equally) gross involving Grylls and a dead camel.

DLL continues to question the rationality of going to sea with a dead camel, and, helpless with laughter, I'm now saddled with this image:




Of Han Solo cutting open the dead tauntaun he was riding on that ice-planet at the start of Star Wars (was II, is now V (I think)).

Then, in looking up that image, I found pictures of: dead tauntaun belly sleeping bags for kids, a calf-tattoo of Han riding his tauntaun, and toys with “tauntaun belly compartment included (fits Luke Skywalker doll).