The Bridges of Southampton

Breakfast

Vegetarian for BLISS. New Forest for me. Perfectly poached egg. Hers were perfectly scrambled. Even the beans were right.

Mushrooms.

They're often the barometer of breakfast quality. When they've clearly not sat around at all, let alone too long, when they're spot on, usually the rest follows.

Unlimited toast, and no hanging about for it while everything else cools off – that's important too.

Cattle and horses

We had to stop and take photos of these longhorn cattle. Bovine Boris Johnson lookalikes, with great big horns, and foppish haircuts. Ponies, too, we got oads of photos of ponies. They're extremely photogenic when they're wandering about. Free. It's the freedom that's the difference. No fences, no pens. Just the occasional cattle-grid limiting their movements.

The noise of machinery

Our room was over the pool, and over the pool extract system. Then, when BLISS decided to get another hours kip in the morning, someone started Kango-ing out some concrete next door. It was uncanny. She shut her eyes, and less than a microsecond later the pneumatic drilling kicked off.

Then, when we stopped on the way home for quick walk, they were steamrollering the aggregate path on the other side of the road.

Were they following her around?

Southampton – find that bridge

We looked for a scenic bridge, which we were sure we could see in the distance. We found a short, concrete monstrosity they still had the cheek to charge us 60p to cross.

Can I take it to the bridge?

Nope. Not in Southampton. It's closed.

Thai lunch

How come the place was almost empty? A meal deal, a soulless sarnie, bag of crisps and fizzy water costs £3.50. For a tenner we had a starter and a main, bith hot, both delicious. BLISS had spring rolls and a yellow vegetable and tofu curry. I had the dim sum dumplings and a hot chicken curry.

DLL babysitting more than the dogs

DLL ended up babysitting my ridiculous mother as well as the dogs, via the police and social services. Why can't she just behave herself and stop causing stress and grief?

BLISS and DLL are nice, kind people, and they shouldn't have their patient natures taken advantage of in this way. It's a two-tier system. If we lived abroad or miles away, the services would be stuck with her, and they couldn't unload their work onto us.